Tapping my fingers impatiently on the steering wheel, I marveled at the speed at which my small town was growing. My 7 minute drive home from work was now a […]
Tapping my fingers impatiently on the steering wheel, I marveled at the speed at which my small town was growing. My 7 minute drive home from work was now a 15 minute drive. Then my phone beeped it’s cheery song at me – it was the fertility clinic! I pulled to the side of the road to take the call on that dark and cold early December evening. My coordinator was checking in on my medications as the embryo transfer date approached. We quickly realized there had been a miscommunication the prior week, which resulted in me not receiving a certain medication I needed to ensure a successful transfer.
What does this mean???
I could hear her rustling papers and quickly counting and recounting days on the calendar.
“Your body won’t be ready for the transfer,” she finally told me. “We’ll need to re-coordinate your cycle and medications, and the transfer will take place in January instead.”
I felt my heart drop and I tried to listen as she continued. Since they had already begun preparing to collect the eggs from the egg donor to begin the fertilization process, they would continue as planned but then freeze the embryo until the transfer date instead of transferring it fresh.
We agreed to follow up the next day about the new timeline and my medication dosages for the upcoming weeks. She agreed to communicate this with the egg donor and my intended parents. Struggling to sound cheery, I thanked her and finished the call as quickly as possible.
Sitting on the side of the dark road, I was engulfed in disappointment. My heart was heavy.
But why? Why in the world am I so upset? It just pushes the process back a few weeks; a month at the most. Not a big deal! Buck up; it will be an October due date instead of September.
But I’m so let down.
Throughout the entire 5 month process, I thought I’d fully grasped my excitement and hope of having the baby for Johan and Anders. But it was realizing that the experience would be delayed that truly brought it into focus. I wondered how disappointed the Swedes would be to find out about the month delay. Everything regarding the surrogacy had progressed very smoothly so far; hopefully this one little speed bump would not be too frustrating for them.
I chewed on my lower lip as I drove home and tried to focus on the positives. All I can do is hurry up and wait. One more month of running, snowboarding and of drinking caffeinated coffee, at least. Must. Think. POSITIVE.