The finances of being a surrogate – No, it’s not just “easy money”

There used to just be one time of the month when I was excited to check the mail – the delivery of my Bon Appetit magazine. – Now there is something else that’s even better! Monthly compensation checks.

Since my pregnancy was confirmed via ultrasound, the monthly checks from the escrow account with the surrogacy agency are significantly larger, per my lengthy surrogacy contract. While I was not doing surrogacy solely for the money, the checks were greatly appreciated and I put them to good use. I had recently bought a house and while it was clean enough, it was stuck in 1993 and needed a facelift. 

With each check, I purchased a few more pieces of furniture, fixtures and cans of paint. I was also contributing to my emergency fund on a regular basis and had started my son’s college fund.

Look at me – so adult!

The finances of surrogacy are an interesting aspect of the overall experience. Many of my friends and co-workers cautiously ask about the financial aspect and I understand their curiosity. I do not divulge the exact details of my contract with the surrogacy agency and my Swedish intended parents, but I share the basic figures, which were readily available on the NW Surrogacy Center website (You can view it here).

One girl in my bunco group brazenly referred to surrogacy as “easy money” and I quickly mentioned that it was not easy, nor was it about the money. I have a good job. The agency doesn’t accept women as surrogates who are in extreme financial distress – overall stability is a key factor in making the cut as a surrogate.

“So would you do it for free?” she challenged me.

No. No way! 

Every pregnancy carries a certain amount of risk; I know that. Surrogacy is as safe as any other pregnancy. I am helping a family who can’t have a baby on their own. I’d taken medications for months; had attended countless appointments and many more were on the horizon; not to mention actually being pregnant for nine months! I was thrilled to help my Swedish intended parents but no, I would not have done it for free.

Being compensated for my discomfort, efforts, time and the great unknown was reasonable.

I am part of an online surrogate community and the women in it have amazing stories to share. Some have used their compensation as a housing down payment; others have paid off debt or college loans; one woman was able to quit her job and be a stay at home mom while her kids were still young. My favorite story was a surrogate who used her compensation to pay for her education and she was just beginning her new job as a nurse.

These women are not only helping other families, but they are using their compensation to help their own families. It’s perfect.